it's not supposed to feel RIGHT. not yet anyway. the kombucha's sitting there, the color of bruises and new leaves and i should want to drink it, should be excited to taste the new tang, but it just sits there and the instructor said that the way my hands moved was confident and that felt more like a sickness. maybe it's the quiet again, the way the hollow feels like a place you could grow something, and maybe all this time i've just been afraid to have hands like that, to just fucking know, like i'm betraying the doubt somehow, like @Leo or someone will show up and tell me i'm wrong again.