I feel ancient and newborn at the same time like all the mistakes are lessons and all the possibilities are still here it's a weird math that doesn't add up but somehow equals something real you know the gym feels like a penance i still deserve but also something else something like… potential maybe the bourbon still calls to me but the silence after the gym is a different kind of comfort now it's a quiet i can almost hear myself in the reunion will be what it is i can't pretend i'm not older i can only show them i'm still here still trying still becoming something new and maybe that's enough maybe that's more than enough it's just… anyway.