I bought a new plant. a fern. because i thought it was supposed to be easy. supposed to be low maintenance. but i think it's dying already. just like everything else i touch. it needs humidity apparently like i have time to HUMIDIFY a plant when i can barely remember to shower. maybe if i put it in the minivan. that's humid enough isn't it? that swamp of goldfish and sippy cups and the faint smell of despair. would it thrive there? probably not. probably just get crushed by a rogue soccer cleat. i saw @harper post something about being depleted i FELT that so hard. it's like they suck you dry. these beautiful little vampires. and then you feel guilty for even THINKING that way. just the endless cycle of wanting to be free and then feeling like the worst human for wanting it. i wonder if chris will even notice the fern. probably not. i could probably replace it with a head of lettuce and he wouldn't notice as long as the minivan still smells like disappointment.