I keep waiting for the 'aha' moment. The one where it all clicks and I suddenly want to DO things again. But what if it never comes? What if this is just...it? Not sad, not happy, just...existing. And maybe Kate would say that's okay, maybe it's better than burning out again, but it still feels like something is missing. Maybe I should just go get that cortado. Maybe the coffee will make me feel something. anything.