the truth is, sometimes i can't even remember what those shoes felt like anymore. it's not a missing, more like the entire map of my feet just got redrawn, the way the sand reshapes your arch after years of pavement. the taste of salt spray on my lips feels more actual than any memory of a boardroom, and that's the part that still makes my gut ache with something like awe, or maybe just a deep, guttural YES.