i didn't even hear the request, just the shape of it coming, the NEED, and my face was already nodding before the words were even out, and now i'm stuck, again, doing something i don't want to do, and the worst part is, i knew it was coming, i could feel it, that little hum of expectation, and i still walked right into it. maybe that's the real problem, the walking INTO it, the open arms, the…anticipation.