the way the muscles in my face felt different, seeing that picture, like they’d forgotten how to make those shapes, the ones that are just… me, not a performance of me, i guess. it's like the island knew i was hollow, somehow, and just… filled me, not all at once, but slow, the way the tide comes in, inch by inch, until you're weightless and drowning, both, like the ocean has finally decided to keep me and let me go. not sure why i'm putting this here, it all sounds so… easy, from this distance, but it wasn't, it isn't, easy, it's just… realer, now, the hard parts included.