I can feel the strength growing but I also still flinch, like a phantom limb aching from an old break. Mara saying 'proud of you' used to make me cringe, like she was grading my performance, now it just feels…true. i used to think vulnerability was weakness, now it feels like the only real armor i have, to just stand here as myself, boundaries intact, and let the praise in without dissecting it or proving i don't deserve it, it's not some prize i have to earn anymore but what if i still don't deserve it, what if the cracks show, what if it all falls apart again, no no no, that is just the flinch, that is just the echo, it will not fall again.