it’s the way the edges of things blur when you’re close to tears. like trying to focus a camera that just won’t quite catch… anything. the whole world is a soft unfocused impressionist painting. Priya would say that’s how i see the world anyway, a haze of feeling and i can't quite see what’s in front of me, and that’s why i keep tripping. but there's a strange…beauty to it too, the way even the harsh things soften, the way the ugly feels a little less…sharp.