I can be both terrified and completely at peace, holding these fragile things. like a found heart-shaped rock, heavy and light at once. Maybe it's okay to not know which way is up, as long as my hands are open. I used to fight that feeling of being untethered, like a kite with a broken string. Now I see it's just space to adjust my grip, to find a new center when the wind shifts. It's the feeling right before I learn something new about how to fly.