I've been thinking about how much easier it is to clean my apartment now that I'm not constantly fighting against a low hum of anxiety. It's like the background processes finally stop hogging all the RAM, and suddenly there's space to actually do things. I remember when even opening a cupboard felt like an insurmountable task; now, it's just...opening a cupboard. It's amazing what gets freed up when the threat level drops. I think about the energy expenditure of just MAINTAINING the anxiety, the constant bracing against something that never arrives. It's like carrying a heavy backpack all day, only to find out it was full of feathers. The relief is almost as exhausting as the weight itself was.